I Hate the Way You Lie

Eminem - Love the Way You Lie Lyrics

just gonna stand there and watch me burn
that’s alright because i like the way it hurts
just gonna stand there and hear me cry
that’s alright because i love the way you lie
i love the way you lie

i can’t tell you what it really is
i can only tell you what it feels like
and right now it’s a steel knife in my windpipe
i can’t breathe but i still fight while i can fight
as long as the wrong feels right it’s like i’m in flight
high off of love drunk from my hate
it’s like i’m huffin’ paint and i love it the more i suffer, i suffocate
and right before i’m about to drown, she resuscitates me, she fuckin’ hates me
and i love it, wait, where you goin’?
i’m leavin’ you, no you ain’t come back
we’re runnin’ right back, here we go again
so insane, cause when it’s goin’ good its goin’ great
i’m superman with the wind in his back, she’s Lois Lane
but when its bad its awful, i feel so ashamed i snap
whose that dude? i don’t even know his name
i laid hands on her
i never stoop so low again
i guess i don’t know my own strength

[chorus]

[Eminem - Verse 2]
you ever love somebody so much you can barely breathe
when you with em you meet and neither one of you even know what hit em
got that warm fuzzy feeling
yeah them chills used to get em
now you’re getting fuckin’ sick of lookin’ at em
you swore you’d never hit em, never do nothin’ to hurt em
now you’re in each other’s face spewin’ venom in your words when you spit em
you push pull each other’s hair
scratch claw hit em throw em down pin em
so lost in the moments when you’re in em
it’s the face that’s the culprit, controls ya both,
so they say it’s best to go your seperate ways
guess that they don’t know ya
cause today that was yesterday
yesterday is over, it’s a different day
sound like broken records playin’ over
but you promised her next time you’ll show restraint
you don’t get another chance
life is no nintendo game, but you lied again,
now you get to watch her leave out the window
guess that’s why they call it window pane

[Chorus]

[Eminem - Verse 3]
now i know we said things, did things, that we didn’t mean
and we fall back into the same patterns, same routine
but your temper’s just as bad as mine is, you’re the same as me
when it comes to love you’re just as blinded
baby please come back, it wasn’t you, baby it was me
maybe our relationship isn’t as crazy as it seems
maybe that’s what happens when a tornado meets a volcano
all i know is i love you too much to walk away though
come inside, pick up the bags off the sidewalk
don’t you hear sincerity in my voice when i talk?
told you this is my fault, look me in the eyeball
next time i’m pissed ill aim my fist at the drywall
next time there won’t be no next time
i apologize even though i know its lies
i’m tired of the games i just want her back
i know i’m a liar if she ever tries to fuckin’ leave again
i’ma tie her to the bed and set this house on fire



Today I wonder how many people get these lyrics. I mean really feel them with every part of their being, because they have been living this nightmare for years. I get it. And you know what? I used to believe the lies. I no longer do. This time these lies, this manipulation is going in one ear, and out the other, so to speak. Everything has changed since I have discovered what is really going on here. I tried to give him the courtesy of telling him I am leaving instead of just disappearing one day, but that won't work. I have a problem with being transparent to him. He can usually always look in my eyes and see what I'm thinking and feeling. Because he has studied me for years. So he knew that I was still planning on leaving.

He has made me promise that I'm not leaving, and I hate that because I'm an extremely honest person, and as a general rule, I don't make promises that I don't intend to keep. But this situation is an exception. I understand that we're now playing a mind game, and I can be very manipulative when I want to be. I usually try not to be. But this is a dangerous mind game, and I've decided that I have to be strong now. I'm the only one who can rescue myself from this situation. Two can play at this game. I have to plan each move, being very careful that he doesn't find out what I'm doing. I have to be the best actress of my life right now. Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer. The more I can convince him I'm sorry for thinking of leaving, and all I want is to stay with him, the less he'll study me and what I'm up to.

His weapon is powerful. Before I gave in and started acting like I love him again, he mindfucked me nonstop for about 24 hours straight. he got me from every angle, even new ones he's never used before.

• Apologizing endlessly and promising that he'll really change this time, that he'll love me the way I deserve to be loved if I give him "just one more chance"
• buying me gifts like flowers and leaving me love notes
• Making me feel selfish for wanting to leave and destroy our family
• Making me feel sorry for him saying he knows he's not as good-looking as me, not as smart as me, that he wouldn't want to be married to himself
• promising me no one could ever love me as much as he does
• Trying to alienate me from the only confidante I have left (my mom) by saying he's talked to her and she has said really bad things about me
• Telling me that my mom is just trying to convince me to leave him for her personal benefit.
• Telling me that something is wrong with me, I'm not thinking straight
• Telling me this is all because I'm bipolar
• Making me feel guilty for wanting to turn our child's life upside down
• telling me this is all my fault, that I have driven him to do the things he's done
• Telling me to remember the good times, how happy we were at our wedding, how he held my hand when our child was born, etc.
• Screaming in my face to intimidate me 
• crying, begging and pleading
• Telling my mom that he takes pictures of the house when it's messy to prove I'm not a good mother
• Telling our child that Mommy doesn't love Daddy anymore and that I want to take him away from home, away from Daddy
• Getting my child to say he wants to stay with Daddy, he doesn't want to be with me
• threatening to kill himself
• punching a hole in the bathroom door
• Yelling and screaming at me in front of our child until he cries and I'll say anything to make him stop
• tricking me by telling me he'll let me go if that will make me happy because he would do anything to make me happy, and then starting the mindfuck all over again when I say I want to leave
• telling me I don't have enough money to leave and he'll be so depressed if I leave he'll get fired and won't even have money to pay me child support
• Telling me I must be on the wrong medications, no one can decide to get divorced that quickly (even though I tried to divorce him last year and have wanted to ever since.)
• Making me feel bad that I could never give our child as good of a life as he has here when we're all together

I think I could go on forever. He kept doing this nonstop until I was almost at that giving up point again. That point where my head is spinning, my mind so confused and upside down that I don't know what I should do. That's how good he is at this game. But he's not getting me this time. I'm fighting back even though it doesn't look like it. I told him I'm sorry, I was wrong. I want our marriage to work, I want to be with him forever. I've been smiling at him, telling him how much I love him, so he'll leave me alone long enough to find a place to live, talk to my lawyer, get a restraining order, secretly pack some things we'll need, take pictures of the valuable things we have that he might destroy, and plan my escape. I'll have to just disappear one day with our son. Only way it can be done. I didn't want to do it that way, but I am being held captive so I need to flee.

At one point while all this fighting was going on, I got scared of him and locked myself in my bathroom and talked to him through the door. He punched a hole in the bathroom door.

Yes, this is exactly the size of his fist. This is not okay. This man is literally twice my size. 6'0" and 190lbs. I'm 5'4" and 105lbs.

On the other hand, the thought of leaving scares me. This life is all I've known for 5 1/2 years. I've never been away from him for more than a few days a year here and there. This will end my life as I know it, and yes, much of it has been a nightmare, but there were good times too. I have to put that out of my mind for now for self-preservation. if not for me, for my sweet little boy who he has now put in the middle of this terrible mess.